Friday, April 2, 2010

Move On!!!!!!!

Time Slips like key technical concepts slipped from my buttered mind during study years(1.2 million fps) and again I start to vomit thoughts on paper with a feeling that something’s dying to come out .. don’t know what don’t know what should.

Work has been light lately with two major projects nearing end from my part with another major about to start, but ehh that can wait till Monday. So here I am, during the Friday after lunch hours staring at a weekend off and thinking, what will I do this weekend??? Do I even need it? And then a totally disturbing thought does me in.. I design solutions that bridge communication gap between people and I myself need these swadhaya moments to communicate with me…

Like I said, I was sitting in office around 2-3 pm spending some quality time with myself and a thought grazed my mind. I am becoming a mature person with every passing moment. I am more mature than I was yesterday, I am more mature than I was in morning , I am more mature than I was a second ago and hey as I wrote last line I just got a bit more fledged. To put this demeaning thought to rest I starting surfing websites, I stopped on the online newspaper for which I used to write during my college years and then just kept searching for my articles, and to my utter dismay I found them, so I thought since I have found it I might as well read them and get more glimpse of what I was sitting on that plastic chair in front of my desktop in a place called Room No. E-115 when a million ambitions passed my mind every day and world was not scary as it is now.

I don’t know how much of u all read thru my recent orkut status message (and don't know how many of u will read this post)which said “There something magical about perfect send offs”. I have a feeling that I haven’t been fair with many of my closet and best friends since the college ended, I let my friends drift when I should have held on to them. I managed just one call with my one of the best buddies “shekhar” in one year when earlier there wasn’t a single day when I wudnt wink at his never ending sleep and we never got tired of talking about which girl to chase who to pass on and will rant about my long blogs. Rat who was apple of my eyes not just for the fact he was first in college to befriend me but was more or less every time there for late night walks and I can’t tell how much I was happy when he finally got his joining letter. Then there were special people Rumie, Harshal,Tushar, Sammy ,Apurva, Arjun , shruti, kirti, Prachi,Balak and I thought I lost all these friends to the time. I haven’t been able to contact with most(all) of these that often and I even thought of giving all them a send off … I guess now u know intent of that orkut status message, but then that day I thought I would be waste without all these people because they still are part of my world and will always be part of my memories and so I purged that thought within a day. Too mushy… isn’t it??? Neways I am ok with that feeling.I don't know if u all still want to remain in touch with me also and its okk if u don't feel the same.

I am still gazing out of that office window, a new high rise office building was in progress and there is a crow sitting on it.. tringg tringg trriiinnggggggg …omg that’s my reporting manager Neetika chhabra calling…

Ajeet- Hello maaam
Neetika Chhabra- Is that approach note for corporate self care ready??
Ajeet- I am on it maam ( lie), will mail u before I take off.
Neetika chhabra- okk”

I look out.. crow is gone.. it moved on.. and so should I… approach is to be started (forget completing) thinking have I really moved on and that,can I ever “Move on” knowing that willingly or unwillingly I will have to revisit these thoughts, memories again.
I am listening to some preloaded songs on my laptop, which are there since college days and it takes me to that setting. …Plastic chair, there is a basketball lying on the floor and badminton racket on the top shelf. a song is playing full volume and has been put on repeat for past 2 hours and stinky socks that haven’t been washed since 2 months now,.behind me, my rumie is still slleping and shekhar some 2 rooms away.Harshal is reading some novel 2-3 rooms left of my room and Rat is still struggling with his PC, Arjun is out with Samata. And I am in middle of all these happenings thinking “ today I will try to put that basket in from that position, I will try to deceive that person and then score that way, I will try to run 2 more rounds of ground, I will hit that shot that way…. I will shortly go out of the room and will sit in the corridor gap and cook more ambitions” …… ohh no song has finished and it’s a fast forward .. I recollect , I have moved on…. Really so…. I don’t think so…

3 comments:

Gravity said...

:nostalgia:

Apurva said...

:senti: :(

archer said...

dude... for the first time... felt empathy... it was a great post my friend...